He had a handlebar mustache

RJ: I'm not going to lie, i don't want to shave it...but i'm in a silver window where my boss is out and I don't have to meet with the government.
me: keep it
then walk in with a slim jim between your teeth, neon arm bands
and ridiculous sunglasses
then get up on a chair and scream "Ohhhhhhhhhhh yeeeeeaaaaaaaa!" as you fly to the ground with an elbow, shattering a co-worker's spine
if you don't get promoted, you'll at least get a bonus