It'll keep you warm

RoXyAnGeL: i can't get the heat to turn on
it's freezing
me: it's okay
you'll be warmed by the silent glow of burning corpses once you move into the mansion
RoXyAnGeL: well that doesn't help me now, does it
me: no, no it doesn't
just go burn a burrito in the microwave or something
and stick that in your pants
RoXyAnGeL: that's not very good advice

Tangent #2

me: k Jason eats lunch now
considers buying last minute plane ticket to Andy Reid's house
knocks on door dressed up as girl scout to sell cookies
Andy Reid orders THREE HUNDRED boxes
Jason opens up order form to reveal super charged taser
blasts Andy Reid with 1400 volts of electricity
chuckles to himself over symbolic demise, due to loss at San Diego Chargers
leaves house
enjoys 300 boxes of cookies, courtesy of Andy Reid
gains SERIOUS weight
becomes the NEW Andy Reid
coaches Eagles to superbowl victory
is praised for symbolic, hilarious efforts
retires